Difficult Decisions

Author Photo
By Mary Conley | Jun 18, 2014

Dear friends,

I had a heavy heart for about a month as I needed to make a decision about having back surgery. An area of my back has caused me some trouble for years, but I babied it and sat and slept with a lumbar roll. Then last fall, I stepped in a hole. Since the pain was in my leg instead of my back until lately, it had me fooled. I wanted to wait until fall for surgery, but finally had it on Friday, which means I’m out of commission for this growing season, and you know how much I love growing and harvesting our food. It also made me cry to miss my granddaughter Katie’s senior piano recital and graduation, but realizing how much the pain escalated the last two weeks, I’m thankful I didn’t wait another day, let alone until fall.

Everything in life is an experience, though, and now I know about the wonderful nursing staff at Immanuel hospital in Omaha. Thankfully, there are people with the much needed talent and compassion to take care of us when we need them. We had a great time together, joking and laughing through the pain and humiliating loss of privacy.

Now that I won’t be able to do farm work this year, especially the important harvesting and preserving, I’m more open to the new role the farm will play in my life. Larry and I have been slowing down considerably, anyway, so an attitude adjustment was inevitable. Somehow, I’ve thought I must be the only person in the world who has too much to do, learn, and experience to get old. I’ve been mad that I wasn’t 10 years younger, so I could work longer on the farm. Yes, there is always another type of tree or vegetable I want to plant for the first time.

I’ve often ended my blogs by telling you that we should meet here again, soon, to learn about something or another, but this time, I’ll have to admit, I haven’t a clue what that will be. I’m only interested in my next pain pill, and if I’ll ever have another bowel movement. As I’ve mentioned before, “This too shall pass” or ”Just take me out and shoot me” or “What kind of a plan is that?” Take your pick!

Here, I’m doing “laps” up and down the walkway on our upper level. It is nice to have something to hang onto.

My newest “best friend” is my back brace. It holds me together and gives me confidence that I’m going to make it. I also have a patient private nurse named Larry.

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