How do you know it’s the first day of spring in orchard country?
If you said, “Look at the calendar and see what’s written there,” you would, unfortunately, be wrong. You might also say something like, “Well, it’s the first day of spring when the bees are buzzing and the trees start to bloom.” You’d be pretty close, but no cigar!
Around here, the first day of spring is when your house is dive-bombed by a crop duster.
Here comes the villain
It is always on Sunday — just when you’ve decided to sleep in before you finally admit you need to drag yourself out of bed to feed the livestock and then be on time for church. Are you kidding? On this first day of spring, there’s absolutely no sleeping in.
Why does it have to be Sunday? Think of all the lovely days of the week that are perfectly suitable for the First Day flyover. There’s the wonderful Monday, Tuesday, or Wednesday. There’s even Thursday, Friday, or Saturday. But, NO. It’s got to be Sunday for some reason. I can just see the pilot maniacally laughing as he does his low flyover on the way to the almond orchards.
“Ha ha! Just try to sleep in! Ha ha! It’s the Red Baron in his biplane and I have the controls!” The house rattles. The horses, sheep, chickens, and ducks scatter! You go out the back door and glare and the pilot just tips his wings in acknowledgement and comes back again in two minutes. I can think of a number of ways to exact revenge — none of them safe. I guess I’d rather be dive-bombed than crashed into. However, a giant slingshot loaded with cow manure comes to mind. Ready! Aim! Fire!
Take that! You scoundrel!
The true solution for the First Day of Spring is to get out of bed early, ahead of the villain, and head for the local cafe for ham and eggs over-easy with a big cup of joe. See you there!
